Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead

One of the things he told me was that my desire to be liked by everyone would hold me back. He said that when you want to change things, you can’t please everyone. If you do please everyone, you aren’t making enough progress. Mark was right.

A more junior woman (or man) can also intervene in the situation when a female colleague has been interrupted. She can gently but firmly tell the group, “Before we move on, I’d like to hear what [senior woman] had to say.” This action not only benefits the senior woman but can raise the stature of the junior woman as well, since speaking up for som

Career progression often depends upon taking risks and advocating for oneself—traits

it’s better to focus on specific problems with real solutions. Most people in the position to mentor are quite adept at problem solving.

stretch assignments and take on high-visibility projects,

“What have I done for you lately?”

Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face. Fear of not being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. And the holy trinity of fear: the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter.

Arianna Huffington, founder of The Huffington Post, believes that learning to withstand criticism is a necessity for women.

Every so often, Clara would contact me, always with an interesting point or a thoughtful question. She never asked to get together to “catch up.” She never asked a question that she could have found the answer to on her own.