Right now the Metalabel squad is in the throes of the creative process of something you’ll see in the Fall. We’re excited about what we’re working on but we’re also in the thick of it. We still don’t know where it will all lead.

Some days the not-knowing is agonizing. The first time I experienced the feeling came while building Kickstarter, and it often got the best of me. But having gone through it before, I now appreciate how rare it is to not-know something you care about and are willing into existence with its ultimate outcome truly unknown.

Our challenge now is basic — universal even: how to express our ideas in a way that others will hear. Not just the words, but how we mean them. It’s not enough for the facts to translate. Feelings too.

Tuning this dial is an act of creativity. It’s that process, neverending, always a surprise, where we gaze into the void past the point of discomfort to bring back truth. It sounds simple but the lived experience is much more humbling.

Two weeks ago I got so frustrated with the not-knowing I spent two days mad at myself. We wouldn’t be having these problems if I wasn’t so… heady, so intellectual, so me.

I finally got so frustrated I started a document where I wrote mean things about myself and Metalabel, roasting the project. Things like:

Metalabel: So esoteric nobody knows what it is

Metalabel: That HBO show people you don’t like tell you to watch

Metalabel: Yes it’s complicated. But so are you.

I was letting out my frustration, but the process felt refreshing. By saying mean things to myself, it weirdly defanged what others could say. Owning my inner critique helped me let go of my fear.

So what if we’re not for everybody?

So what if we’re deep more than shallow?

So what if we celebrate things more esoteric and less commercial?

The truth is we’re not for everyone. But nothing is. So why hold ourselves to that kind of impossible standard? Instead we keep learning and re-learning that embracing being not for everyone pushes you into being more you.

We’re weeks away from releasing more of who we are. While we’re in the thick of it, this continues to be our guiding question: how much more can we be ourselves?