And maybe that’s why so many of us are now allergic to saying “I have a boyfriend” out loud. We want to distance ourselves from that archetype as much as possible. The one who made a man her personality. The one who lost her plot. So we hide our relationships not just from others, but from the fear of becoming her.

And then there’s the obvious: men as a whole are embarrassing. Times are hard. The bar is subterranean. The probability of a man humiliating you publicly, digitally, or spiritually is dangerously high. They will cheat, fumble, like a thirst trap, or worse, start a podcast. And when that happens, you go from “iconic” to “unfortunate” in record time.