Self-pity connotes victimization and martyrdom, and even though you may indeed feel victimized, this attitude will prevent you from taking action and will inevitably drive people away.
Rokelle Lerner • The Object of My Affection Is in My Reflection: Coping with Narcissists
Use setbacks in life as an opportunity to become a bigger and better person. Don’t wallow.
... See moreAnother thing of course is life will have terrible blows, horrible blows, unfair blows, doesn’t matter. And some people recover and others don’t. And there I think the attitude of Epictetus is the best. He thought that every mischance in life was an opportunit
Farnam Street • The Munger Operating System: How to Live a Life That Really Works
What a heavy burden it is to have to battle with the world to get what you want and if the world does not respond, to have to battle with yourself. How hard it is to believe that if you are poor, ill, ugly or unlucky it is your own fault; that you are flawed and so must change. These ideas suggest that you are an accumulation of various shortcoming
... See moreVadim Zeland • Reality transurfing. Steps I-V
It’s one thing to recognize your hurt. It’s quite healthy, in fact, to see and appreciate your own emotional injuries. Especially because as adults, there is no tall, shadow-casting grown-up sitting just within earshot, ready to run to our aid the moment something hurts us. We have to be that adult for ourselves. Where this healthy self-empathy tur
... See moreAugusten Burroughs • This Is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike.
“You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself. I don’t say this as a condemnation–I need regular reminders to stop feeling sorry for myself too. I’m going to address you bluntly, but it’s a directness that rises from my compassion for you, not my judgement of you. Nobody’s going… Show more
Defining yourself by your suffering is an effective way to keep suffering forever
lesswrong.com • 100 Tips for a Better Life
Which brings me to the other big misunderstanding that this quote has caused. Pain and suffering are useful in building resilience. Resilience is good—it gives you the stamina to do really hard things. And if you are doing hard things because it’s your purpose, then you are living a life aligned with your values (which is the ideal). However, this
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