How To Win Friends and Influence People

‘Education,’ said Dr. John G. Hibben, former president of Princeton University, ‘is the ability to meet life’s situations.’

If your temper is aroused and you tell ’em a thing or two, you will have a fine time unloading your feelings. But what about the other person? Will he share your pleasure? Will your belligerent tones, your hostile attitude, make it easy for him to agree with you?

If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I’ll tell you what you are. That determines your character.

If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes; but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your opponent’s good will.

When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.

Which would you rather have, an academic, theatrical victory or a person’s good will? You can seldom have both.

If you disagree with them you may be tempted to interrupt. But don’t. It is dangerous. They won’t pay attention to you while they still have a lot of ideas of their own crying for expression.

Let’s realise that the person we are going to correct and condemn will probably justify himself or herself, and condemn us in return;

the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.