How to Stay Sane (The School of Life)

the accusation is about how the other person feels and they will not feel better if they are made to feel wrong as well.

The topics are: i) Appreciations; ii) New Information; iii) Questions; iv) Complaints with Recommendations for Change; and v) Wishes, Hopes and Dreams.

When you are next doing chores around the house – cooking, cleaning, washing, etc. – focus with complete awareness on what you are doing, mentally recording each feeling, thought, sensation or memory as it enters your head.

sometimes a new behaviour feels false or unreal but is merely unfamiliar. In my experience what ‘feels’ true might not actually be the truth, or good for us; it might merely be familiar. And, conversely, what feels ‘false’ might not be; it might just be new.

Good stress causes new neural connections. It is what we need for personal development and growth.

feeling superior is no substitute for companionship

Therefore we need to be self-aware. What stories are we telling ourselves about other people? What dynamic do our stories suck us into, and how do they determine the meanings we put on things and how we define them?

It is too easy for us to fall into the trap of believing that being right is more important than being open to what might be.

Remember, the idea is not to fight, and a good relationship is not about determining who is right and who is wrong.