How to Stay Sane (The School of Life)

the accusation is about how the other person feels and they will not feel better if they are made to feel wrong as well.

If we are our emotions, rather than an observer of them, we will veer into a chaotic state.

This book concluded that, contrary to our expectations, a lack of emotion does not lead to logical, reasoned choices but to chaos. This is because we rely on feelings to navigate our way through our lives. This is true whether or not we are aware of our emotions.

sometimes a new behaviour feels false or unreal but is merely unfamiliar. In my experience what ‘feels’ true might not actually be the truth, or good for us; it might merely be familiar. And, conversely, what feels ‘false’ might not be; it might just be new.

feeling superior is no substitute for companionship

We can be unaware of the tales we regularly tell ourselves and even unaware of their effect on us. We act on fantasies as though they are realities.

When you are next doing chores around the house – cooking, cleaning, washing, etc. – focus with complete awareness on what you are doing, mentally recording each feeling, thought, sensation or memory as it enters your head.

If you do not know how to draw positive meaning from what happens in life, the neural pathways you need to appreciate good news will never fire up.

2. The Thirty-Minute Exercise26 Commit to doing this exercise and allotting the full thirty minutes to it. Get yourself a notebook and something to write with. Turn off the phone, computer, radio and television. Resolve not to pick up a book or a newspaper, and choose a time when you will not be disturbed. Get yourself a clock or stopwatch and set it