Jacob Falkovich says that single people often seek out similarity when complementarity is what makes relationships cohere long-term. It’s a great observation. But how to operationalize it? Maybe: look for someone you can’t initially understand, but also don’t feel like walking away from.

Marry someone you don’t want to change, who doesn’t want to change you.

Someone that doesn’t punish you for mistakes.

Someone who sees you as your highest potential.

Commit completely.

Falling in love is easy.

Staying in love is harder.

Enthusiasm is common.

Endurance is rare.

Marriage is for getting through the times when you’re not in love.

Expect things

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