Natural chemistry. Interacting should be easy and natural, energy levels should be in the same vicinity, and you should feel on the same “wavelength” in general.

Jacob Falkovich says that single people often seek out similarity when complementarity is what makes relationships cohere long-term. It’s a great observation. But how to operationalize it? Maybe: look for someone you can’t initially understand, but also don’t feel like walking away from.

And when you choose a life partner, you’re choosing a lot of things, including your parenting partner and someone who will deeply influence your children, your eating companion for about 20,000 meals, your travel companion for about 100 vacations, your primary leisure time and retirement friend, your career therapist, and someone whose day you’ll... See more

• People tend to be bad at knowing what they want from a relationship


• Society has it all wrong and gives us terrible advice

→ Society encourages us to stay uneducated and let romance be our guide.→ Society places a stigma on intelligently expanding our search for potential partners. → Society rushes us.

• Our Biology Is Doing Us No Favors

→ Human... See more