Honoring the Self: The Pyschology of Confidence and Respect

Ego (the Latin word for “I”) is the unifying center of consciousness, the irreducible core of self-awareness—that which generates and sustains a sense of self, of personal identity. Our ego is not our thoughts, but that which thinks; not our judgments, but that which judges; not our feelings, but that which recognizes feelings; the ultimate witness

O ur specific level of evolutionary development as thinking beings makes the process of self-evaluation inevitable and supremely important to us. From this process, we need to emerge with positive self-esteem. Since thinking is involved here and since thinking is an act of choice, attaining positive self-esteem is often a struggle of heroic proport

Pride (as a virtue rather than as an emotion) is moral ambitiousness, a dedication to achieving our highest potential, in our character and in our life—and a refusal to be sacrificial fodder for the goals of others.

Often, when a person declares, “I feel guilty over such and such,” what the person really means but rarely acknowledges is, “I am afraid that if mother or father knew about what I had done, I would be condemned.” We frequently find that the person does not actually regard the action as wrong. In these circumstances, the solution to the problem of “

A man of forty-five may find himself carrying on like a teenager. He may feel awkward and embarrassed yet unable to stop. In all likelihood, unless he becomes conscious of his actions and their underlying intention, he will at some point reinstitute inhibition and repression, aborting his own attempt at growth, so that nothing ever gets solved, the

Children who experience being loved and accepted as they are, who do not feel their basic worth is continually on trial in their parents’ eyes, have a priceless advantage in the formation of healthy self-esteem,

Sometimes when I am stuck on some question or problem I think I should have an answer for, I tell myself, “OK, you don’t know. But if you knew, what might the answer be?” Surprisingly often, the answer appears.

To be self-accepting does not mean to be without a wish to change, improve, evolve. It means not to be at war with ourselves—not to deny the reality of what is true of us right now, at this moment of our existence. We deal once more with the issue of respect for and acceptance of facts—in this case, the facts of our own being.

fear that is experienced and acknowledged can be dealt with; a fear that is denied, in a case such as this, can actually precipitate shock.