Grace-Based Parenting

There is a deep longing in the heart of every child to “make a difference.” They were hard-wired by God to want to do more than take up space and suck up air.

Children face crises in their emotional life where they simply don’t know what to do. They need us close by, paying attention to the situation and giving them the kind of help that gets them through their dilemma in such a way that they are stronger on the other side of it.

As a result of being made in His likeness,2 we have a gnawing need to matter. It’s a sense of purpose that comes from being one of His created works of art. He meant these purposes to be developed and realized. Although many people can contribute to this process, it is the child’s parents that carry the greatest potential for influence. We’re the o

Grace understands that the only real solution for our children’s sin is the work of Christ on their behalf. It is not pristine spiritual conditions or their good behavior. Grace realizes that there is nothing any of us can do on our own to improve our chances with God. There is nothing any of us can do on our own to gain more of God’s love. There i

In Revelation 3:19 Jesus says, “Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline.” God knows that if our sinful choices do not have consequences, they will destroy us. Because He loves us and doesn’t want that to happen to us, He brings about consequences in our life that cause us to learn from our mistakes.

Why did we choose not to defend ourselves? In any given crisis, there are the facts of the conflict and the feelings of the conflict. Depending on which way the parties look at the conflict, both are convinced that they are right and both are convinced that the other person is wrong. If my daughter or son was looking at a particular situation from

Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness! (Matthew 25:21)

He helped parents see the wisdom of listening rather than lecturing, of responding rather than reacting, of engaging rather than dismissing, of praying rather than judging.

They couldn’t see the crossbars that hovered above each of their heads. They couldn’t see the thin strings that came from those crossbars that moved their arms, made them jump, and manipulated their mouths. They couldn’t see the evil hands of Satan, using them like marionettes to do his bidding.

Discipline is one of the key tools God has given to help us groom our children for greatness. To avoid disciplining your child because it makes you feel uncomfortable is to say you love your own best interests more than theirs. Grace-based parents want to see the “peaceful fruit of righteousness” growing in their adult children. The time to plant t