where she was bullied for being too smart and hard-working. Hannah explained to me that “public schools” were, in fact, fee-paying private schools.

Confucius said our hair was a gift from our parents and should be treated as such.

Sujin was determined to make her relationship last until “two-two.” Koreans, I learned, celebrated everything from their first twenty-two days as a couple (hence two-two), then fifty days, a hundred days, two hundred days, three hundred days,

Reading the articles gave me the validation I needed to feel like I wasn’t just being self-indulgent, wallowing in self-pity, but that I had a point. I could stop being so apologetic about my privilege, afraid of sounding like a brat—a “diplobrat” as we are sometimes called. What I was going through was real.

To me, the whole concept of seniority among students was outlandish. I learned that students in the years above us were called sunbae.

all about deferred gratification. Just focus on your studies now. You’ll get to do everything once you get into a good university. You

Music blares through the sound system. I’m on the top bunk, so the speaker is blasting into my ears. I groan and smother myself under my pillow. It’s 6:20 a.m.

I’d had my palms caned by him too, for refusing to sing in front of the classroom as part of our midterm exams.

You were a failure if you went to a regional university. (The one exception is KAIST, known as the MIT of Korea, where my brother studied.