Getting Past Your Past

Label the first column “Recent Events” and the second column “

This is obvious if you’ve ever awakened in the middle of a nightmare. The nightmare is simply your brain trying to process the information. The images reflect the emotions that are being reactivated. For instance, a woman who was molested as a child may have nightmares that a monster is chasing her. When that memory is dealt with during EMDR sessio

and felt the joy of being an “equal” in her relationship.

For all of us, unprocessed memories are generally the basis of negative responses, attitudes and behaviors. Processed memories, on the other hand, are the basis of adaptive positive responses, attitudes and behaviors.

We may plan to do something, but our inner life takes over and we become distracted.

The first step for any of us is to recognize what negative responses we have in the present.

when negative reactions and behaviors in the present can be tracked directly back to an earlier memory, we define those memories as “unprocessed”—meaning that they are stored in the brain in a way that still holds the emotions, physical sensations and beliefs that were experienced earlier in life.

So it’s useful to remember that whatever the persistent negative emotion, belief or behavior that has been bothering you, it’s not the cause of suffering—it’s the symptom.

We are all subject to reactions that researchers call the “halo effect.”