Engineering Management for the Rest of Us

One way to run a values exercise is to give team members a few minutes to pick five values from a list like what we just saw. Once everyone has picked, go around and ask each individual to discuss why those five values resonate with them…

Some highlights have been hidden or truncated due to export limits.

There are no wrong answers when it comes to values. Everyone comes from different backgrounds and lived experiences. The more we understand one another, the easier it is to work together. When people talk about “good” managers, they are likely referring to people who show care and appreciation for people’s values, and also respect their boundaries.

I make a list of team values for whatever organization I run. Why do I do this? Because there are certain things I value on my team, things that I don’t necessarily need to convince the entire company are important.

Doing work to understand values as a team can help members see one another as people, and understand where they are coming from. The act of sharing values can also have a side effect…

Some highlights have been hidden or truncated due to export limits.

When someone is acting in misalignment with their stated values, this is precisely when to be careful. In his book, Nonviolent Communication, Marshall B. Rosenberg points out that “All criticism, attack, insults, and judgments vanish when we focus attention on hearing the feelings and needs behind a message.”

When you’re misaligned, burnout is inevitable. Working on a team with values that largely align with your own is nice, because you can really dig into the makeup of the culture on your team. Clarity is what we’re aiming for here. Clarity is key.

Individual values can be related to ethics and what we think is moral. Cultural values can also reflect context that’s greater than an individual, and…

Some highlights have been hidden or truncated due to export limits.

Working to understand values isn’t a silver bullet to solving every problem, but it affords us a deeper sense of where to start when building understanding and trust within a group. Unpacking a person’s values with them can also help us understand what drives and motivates them. And, the core of working well together is mutual understanding.

Here’s an example of values I’ve put forth on my teams: We celebrate everyone’s wins as though they’re our own. No compare and despair. Be empowered to forge forward, we hired you because you’re an expert. Make mistakes. Choose impact over butts in seats (We’re not counting hours here, focus on making an impact and work when and how you want).

People can be internally inconsistent. Sometimes it seems that someone values one thing, but they act another way instead. For those around them, this can be disorienting. When you see miscommunication or conflict arise, perhaps dig in to whether this may be the source.