When we root for others, it means that we are confident. Rooting for everyone means wanting to beat people at their best. It is honoring them for their talent and respecting them as fellow athletes. We should want them to play well, but just for us to play a little bit better.

Mental toughness is a continuum. It’s not either I have it or I don’t. Mental toughness is how much. How much mental toughness do I have left after making mistakes or after a bad performance? The skills that will translate into life are guts, resilience, and the willpower to fight and never give up.

You’re Mom and Dad—your role is to be supportive, not vicarious.

Failure is never fatal. It may feel like it for a while, but it is only a challenge. Keeping athletics in the proper perspective for our children helps them keep their problems in perspective.

Playing it safe is risky. The safe perfectionist plays not to lose, rather than to win.

Often parents and coaches think of getting athletes to buy in instead of taking ownership. When athletes take ownership of their development, it means that they have skin in the game and stock in the company.

Most parents build dependency, great parents build capacity.

How much do they value winning compared to playing? 2. Can your child earn playing time? 3. How important is a balance between academics and athletics? 4. What is the level of commitment between academics and athletics? (Every school varies.) 5. Did they enjoy the feel of the program and underclass members of the team, not just the seniors? 6. How

Passion and confidence are the most important attributes in our children’s development of mental toughness because it will become difficult at times. If they only play to please their parents or coach, for a scholarship or for pats on the back, it won’t be enough. They will instead become “at-least,” the subject of the next chapter.