yourself and each other; and it takes effort and a

this is how you try to bear the burden of the mystery with grace: by finding humility where you once saw self-pity, and opportunity where you once saw absence. By saying, ‘Even if I don’t get what I want, I have a good life,’

state where we feel that we deserved a different outcome. Although we cannot avoid the first pain, with gratitude

Every relationship – not just

Maybe not having something you want wakes you up to another kind of romance. And when life forces you to live in the intensity of the

To be calmer about the whole process.

So the capacity to say, ‘I could be alone,’ is strangely one of the most important guarantees of one day being with somebody else in a happy way. The

She also reminded me that, as much as love involves consciousness, part of it requires us to close our eyes and jump without a plan. And the fact that we took that leap, without knowing that everything would work out? Perhaps that act of faith, of hope, might carry us through tougher times, when we look back and marvel at it, and think, how little

also a chance to develop the inner resources and love that will serve you well in the years ahead.