Think about why it is that you choose this behavior.

“Attachment is the origin, the root of suffering; hence it is the cause of suffering.” —The Dalai Lama, 1988

Now is enough.

Step 2 is learning to gently and consistently challenge these thoughts and their underlying core beliefs, testing just how accurate they are.

Whether you choose to practice an emotional exposure ladder or simply want to do your action plan when distress naturally rears its head, if you can stay with the emotion in the present, breathe, reorient your behavior, and reward any successes, you essentially train yourself toward greater emotional control and stability.

The answer is that your brain has a built-in bias. To put it very simply, your brain prioritizes negative information. The so-called negativity bias is what it sounds like—we all have an automatic heightened sensitivity to negative, threatening, or unpleasant data.

Why is that?

Acceptance doesn’t mean we agree with what happened or that we like it and shouldn’t try to change it. It only means we gracefully come to terms with what we can’t realistically change so we can focus on what we can.

Awareness. Look at the attachments you have in your life—your partner, your surroundings, your social circles, or your work. Where have you given up power? Do you expect something from those relationships or things? Is any part of your connection controlled by your fear, anxiety, or insecurity? Find out which situations you might need to detach