Brené Brown — Striving versus Self-Acceptance, Saving Marriages, and More (#409) - The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss

I try to make authenticity my number one goal when I go into a situation where I’m feeling vulnerable. If authenticity is my goal and I keep it real, I never regret it. I might get my feelings hurt, but I rarely feel shame. When acceptance or approval becomes my goal, and it doesn’t work out, that can trigger shame for me: “I’m not good enough.” If

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Many of us spend our lives pursuing private acceptance through external success. But no matter the award or honor, our inner doubts will remain. True acceptance comes from inside us. It takes asking ourselves challenging questions like: What do I want from my work? What’s most important about it to me ? How would I create my work differently if I p... See more

The goal is not to be better and better. The goal, every day, is to simply feel where you are and accept it. What is happiness, after all? Happiness is enjoying yourself as you are right now and connecting to other people as they are . That’s it. You don’t have to change anything. You don’t have to win anyone over. You just have to savor this day.

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The examined life

What if our worst qualities are actually our best? Recently I listened to an interview with Irish theologist and poet John O’Donohue from 2006 in which he asked what would happen if the things we hate about ourselves, the qualities we despise and can’t stand, are actually the best things about who we are. It was a powerful reframe... See more