Boundaries for Leaders

“There is such a thing as a ‘follower’ who isn’t getting it, right?” he said. “Sure,” I said. “But on whose watch? In whose culture? Who built the team that allows that? Who is over that employee that is a ‘problem’? And who is over the employee that allows employees like that to be that way? And if that employee is confused about the strategy or d

Strong leaders embrace feedback, seek to understand it, and put it to use. Even when they may disagree, they don’t become defensive; instead they engage in dialogue and honest inquiry to figure out where the gaps between their intentions and others’ perceptions come from. The feedback may be wrong, but they embrace it to understand it nevertheless.

Grow past the fear! Look at what you are afraid of and get to the bottom of it. Is it failure? Is it loss of approval? Is it fear of confrontation? Is it fear of causing someone distress? Is it fear of change? And remember: You can have fears without being “fearful.” “Fearful” is when you let your fears make your decisions for you, so . . . don’t l

What is your appetite for feedback and receptivity to it? Do you get defensive, or reactive? To the extent that you see it as adversarial, your brain will fight it or move away from it. But if you can make receiving feedback part of your value system, if you can frame it as one of the best gifts that you can ever have, then you will become an open

But the truth is that there are five right plans. There are a lot of ways to get there. The real problem is getting the people to do what it takes to make the plan work. That is where you win or lose. It’s always about the people.”

Good boundaries, both those that help us manage ourselves and lead others, always produce freedom, not control.

Leaders, through a handful of essential boundaries, make sure certain things happen, prevent other things from happening, and keep it all moving forward.

The leader’s job is to lead in ways such that people can do what they are best at doing: using their gifts and their brains to get great results.

Reality is all that matters. The gap between where we are and where we want to be, which is the goal, does not go away by itself. We have to close that gap. And we have to deal with gaps that, sometimes, are difficult to face but motivating. People need to be free of toxic relational stress in order to have their brains available to solve problems