Are You a Settler?

Often, there’s a desire to cling onto how we thought life should go, sometimes until it outweighs the reality of how it is going — what makes us happy, versus what we feel should; what is truly stimulating or fulfilling, versus what we’ve been told should be chased and sacrificed for. A question I ponder is: How do we untether ourselves from the pe... See more

There’s a pervasive idea, at least among my peers, that [your 30s] should bring about a sense of calm and self-acceptance. We may have dispensed with the precepts surrounding marriage and kids, but there remains a non-specific expectation of “settling in.” Into yourself, into what you want. I took great comfort in this idea when I was in my 20s. I ... See more

One of the fundamental choices that you face on Earth is the degree to which you’ll pursue deeper but riskier fulfillment or practice avoidance that exempts you from bad feelings but leaves you bereft of good ones.