From the fruitional view, the question is not how our history has shaped our identity dramas, but how we manage to perpetuate patterns of experiencing that used to be relevant but now are no longer necessary or useful. Because we are only living in each present moment, we must re-create these patterns over and over, even as our current adult experi

Nothing needs to change for us to feel complete and at peace except our own perception of reality.

If we can show up without needing to constantly control, plan, or protect ourselves against what might be coming, then every moment is fresh, every moment is a new experiment.

We find that we have very contradictory feelings about dissolving our chronic patterns, even if we believe they are causing us suffering. Most people, it turns out, are actually heavily invested in their problems. From the developmental point of view, we understood this investment as arising from our best efforts to protect and take care of ourselv

“Enlightenment is an accident—but meditation makes us accident-prone.”

As American Zen teacher Baker Roshi once said: “Enlightenment is an accident—but meditation makes us accident-prone.”

In our culture, I’ve observed that many people doing spiritual work tend to choose practices that focus on the mental experience of clarity more than on cultivating an open heart. An example would be a meditation practice in which you put your attention on your breath, while noticing and letting go of the thoughts that enter your mind, one by one.

she hadn’t realized until she stepped into an acceptance practice how much energy she’d spent trying to have something true be not true. In a way, it can appear paradoxical. The effect of this fruitional approach—of Ana’s accepting her feelings of deadness without trying to change them—is that she feels lighter and more alive already! Without any c

As I mentioned earlier, in the West, we believe that a better quality of life comes from improving our sense of self and our life circumstances. Obviously, much of this approach is very accurate; it’s true that better health, financial security, political freedoms, and positive feelings about ourselves are all wonderful qualities. In our culture, w