akos

This makes the importance of conversation noticeable to me. Whenever we drop below a certain level of talking, friction accumulates. We get more stuck in our ways, we get stressed and don’t have time to maintain the shared context necessary to understand each other.

Having talked an ungodly amount early on, there are reserves of shared language and trust. I sit down on the edge of the bed, where Johanna lies with the sleeping toddler. And after an hour, we are in the loop.

The opposite of an unfolding is a vision. A vision springs, not from a careful understanding of a context, but from a fantasy: if you could just make it into another context your problems will go away.2

The context is smarter than you . It holds more nuance and information than you can fit in your head. Collaborate with it.

This is what I infer when I see someone who is comfortable in their unique strangeness, too. There probably exists someone who enabled that evolution of personality. A parent, a friend group, a spouse.

It is rare for people to come into themselves if no one is excited and curious about their core, their potential. We need someone who gives us space to unfold.

Even at very open companies there exists lots of secret sauce, but most of the valuable work of the company is not particularly sensitive, and much of it has widely generalizable lessons. Write about those lessons as you learn them. If at all possible, publish what you write. Even if it is published to an audience of no one, you will be able to... See more

if you have the choice between multiple jobs, all else being equal, pick the one where you are able to show what you've worked on.

Don't end the week with nothing. Prefer to work on things you can show. Prefer to work where people can see you. Prefer to work on things you can own.